“ऑफ द डायस”

काही माणसं ते स्वतः जे आहेत त्यापेक्षा कितीतरी वेगळी अशी आभासी प्रतिमा जगासमोर का उभी करतात? हा प्रश्न मला खुपदा पडतो आणि त्यांच्या सोबतची लोकं ही प्रभावित झाल्यासारखे दाखवतात, किंबहुना प्रभावित होत ही असतील.

एक विशिष्ट category ची माणसं, व्यासपीठावर किंवा दहा लोकांमध्ये असताना आदर्श वाटतात; पण प्रकाशझोतातून थोडे खाली उतरले की त्यांचं व्यक्तिमत्त्वं जणू पूर्णपणे बदलून जातं. मंचावर असताना त्यांची शब्दसंपदा अफाट असते, भाषा अत्यंत समृद्ध असते, आत्मविश्वास ओसंडून वाहत असतो आणि व्यक्तिमत्त्वाची झळाळी सर्वांनाच भुरळ घालते. ते प्रेरणादायी भाषणं करतात, मिळालेल्या पुरस्कारांचा अभिमानाने उल्लेख करतात आणि आपल्या यशाचा देखावा सुंदर रेखाटतात. 

पण व्यासपीठावरून खाली उतरताच चित्र बदलायला लागतं, रंग ही अनोळखी वाटू लागतात. 

त्यांची वागणूक, देहबोली, बोलण्याची ढब, आवाजाचा सूर आणि शब्दांची निवड इतकी बदलते की समोरचा माणूस स्वतःलाच विचारू पाहतो, 

"आत्ताच मायक्रोफोन हातात घेऊन इतकं प्रभावी बोलणारी व्यक्ती हीच आहे काय?"

मला यापेक्षाही अधिक आश्चर्य एका गोष्टीचं वाटतं,

असं दुहेरी व्यक्तिमत्त्वं सतत जगण्यासाठी किती प्रचंड मानसिक ऊर्जा लागत असेल!

स्वतः आपण खरे कोण आहोत, लोकांसमोर स्वतःला कसं दाखवायचं आहे, या दोघांमधील अंतर किती आहे आणि ते अंतर कायम टिकवून ठेवण्यासाठी सतत स्वतःलाच आठवण करून देत राहणं, हा सगळा मानसिक व्यायाम किती दमवणारा असेल ना!

यासाठी केवढी स्मरणशक्ती, किती मानसिक ताकद आणि मेंदूतील पेशींचा किती तो विफल वापर होत असेल!

इतका मानसिक 'कार्डिओ' आपण नेमका कशासाठी करतो? 

तोही अशा गोष्टीसाठी ज्याचा आपल्या मानसिक आरोग्याशी काहीही तसा सकारात्मक संबंध नाही आहे. 

फक्त लोकांचं लक्ष वेधून घ्यावं, तेवढ्या त्या क्षणापुरते कौतुक मिळावं, टाळ्यांचा कडकडाट व्हावा, कानांना ते सुख मिळावे, लोकांनी आपल्याभोवती तेवढ्यापुरतं फिरावं, वा वा करावी….एवढ्यासाठी?

मित्रांनो, या टाळ्यांची किंमत मात्र फार मोठी असते बरंका!

जेव्हा आयुष्य हे एका अभिनयात बदलतं तेव्हा मनात कायम तुलना होत असते. आपल्यापेक्षा अधिक प्रभावी, अधिक यशस्वी, अधिक लोकप्रिय किंवा अधिक प्रसिद्ध अशी एखादी व्यक्ती नेहमीच असते. मग आपल्या प्रगतीचे मापदंड आपल्या स्वतःच्या प्रवासावर आधारित राहत नाहीत; ते इतरांच्या यशावर अवलंबून राहतात.

तिथून सुरू होतो एक न संपणारा त्रासदायक प्रवास, 

सततची तुलना...

अबोल स्पर्धा...

स्वतःची प्रतिमा टिकवून ठेवण्याची धडपड...

आणि मानसिक थकवा.

त्याचा शेवट कशात होतो?

एका नव्या स्पर्धेत...

नव्या मापदंडात...

अस्वस्थेत...

आणि हळूहळू मनःशांती हरवत जाणाऱ्या आयुष्यात.

आपला मानसिक विकास, आपल्या ऊर्जेची दिशा कोणती आहे, यावर अवलंबून असतो.

जर हीच ऊर्जा आपण स्वतःच्या मूळ स्वभावाचं जतन करण्यासाठी आणि आपल्या आत दडलेल्या सकारात्मक गुणांना विकसित करण्यासाठी वापरली, तर त्याचे परिणाम कितीतरी अधिक समाधानकारक आणि लाभदायी असतील.

शास्त्रीय भाषेत सांगायचं झालं तर, ऊर्जेचा तो वापर अधिक ऊर्जाक्षम (thermodynamically feasible) ठरेल.

आणि त्याहून महत्त्वाचं म्हणजे, तो आपल्याला अधिक शांत, अधिक समाधानी आणि अधिक अर्थपूर्ण जीवनाकडे घेऊन जाईल.

मग प्रकाशझोतात असताना एक स्वभाव आणि प्रकाशझोतापासून दूर असताना दुसराच स्वभाव का?

आणि हा प्रश्न केवळ एखाद्या समारंभाचा किंवा मंचापुरता सीमित राहत नाही.

हा प्रश्न आहे आपल्या दररोजच्या 'मी'चा, आपल्या मूळ अस्तित्वाचा.

बहुधा म्हणूनच गुरुतुल्य माणसं सांगून गेली आहेत,

"सर्वात महत्त्वाचा प्रकल्प म्हणजे 'मी' नावाचा प्रकल्प आहे."

स्वतःला पूर्णतः समजून घेणं, स्वतःवर सकारात्मक काम करणं आणि स्वतःचा स्वीकार करणं, यापेक्षा मोठी गुंतवणूक दुसरी कोणतीही असू शकत नाही.

आणि त्यानंतरच निसर्गाने आपल्यामध्ये गुंतवणूक केलेल्या ऊर्जेचा योग्य, सुजाण आणि अर्थपूर्ण नियोजन करून वापर होईल, ज्याला आपण “energy channelling” असं म्हणतो. महत्वाचे आहे की “सो हम” ची जाणीव करून घेऊन त्याला जपणे.

It’s Not the Person; It’s the Pattern

Humans have a pattern in their behaviour, these patterns become their identity which could be soothing and empathetic or could even be empowering, confusing and signaling to something we aren’t aware about. Sometimes unhealthy behaviour does not look dramatic or dangerous in the very beginning. It may quietly surface up in everyday conversations with friends, family members, colleagues, or partners. Many people experience such situations without even knowing the names of these patterns. Understanding them calmly can help us build clearer communication and avoid unnecessary misunderstandings or headache. 

One such behaviour is gaslighting, where a person repeatedly makes someone question their own memory, feelings, or understanding. For example, someone may say, “You’re imagining things,” or “That never happened,” or “you never told me” even when the other person clearly remembers it. Over the time period, this can create self-doubt. A better approach is respectful disagreement without dismissing the other person’s feelings.

Blame shifting is another common habit. Instead of accepting responsibility, a person quickly blames someone else for the situation. It is similar to a student forgetting homework and immediately blaming traffic, friends, or family. Accepting mistakes may feel uncomfortable at first, but it usually solves problems faster and builds trust.

Some people unknowingly worsen conflicts by fanning the flames during a difficult situation or if someone is angry over something. Additional, untimely information, taunts during arguments can make small issues much bigger. Like adding oil to a small kitchen fire, emotional reactions can spread quickly. Calm communication often works better than emotional escalation.

Bread crumbing happens when someone gives assurance but avoids clear action. They may send occasional verbal commitment messages or promises without really implementing them. It feels like being offered tiny snacks when one is expecting a proper meal. Healthy relationships usually involve clarity and dependable actions.

Love bombing may initially feel very flattering because it includes excessive praise, affection, gifts, or attention. However, when it is used only to quickly gain temporary trust or emotional control, it becomes unhealthy. Like watering a plant too much in one day instead of caring for it steadily over time, extreme intensity can become overwhelming. Genuine relationships usually grow gradually and naturally rather than through overwhelming intensity.

Triangulation occurs when a third person is unnecessarily brought into a conflict to create jealousy or competition. Usually authority or admin does this to bring in the insecurity. Statements such as, “Others understand my work principles better than you do,” can increase insecurity instead of solving the actual issue. Honest one-to-one communication is usually healthier.

Another confusing pattern is “word salad,” where conversations are made so disoriented and disorganised that the listener feels mentally tired and confused. Many unrelated topics are mixed together until the original issue is lost intentionally. It resembles untangling a box full of earphone wires where every thread leads somewhere different Simple and clear communication is usually more productive than emotionally exhausting conversations.

Defensive victimhood is seen when someone immediately acts hurt or victimised whenever their behaviour is questioned. Their common sentence is “I am always targeted” Instead of discussing the issue calmly, the focus shifts completely toward comforting them. While everyone deserves empathy, accountability is also important in healthy relationships.

Stonewalling, often called the silent treatment, happens when someone completely shuts down communication. Taking time to cool down is normal, but prolonged silence used as punishment can create emotional distance. A simple statement like, “I need some time before we continue,” is often healthier.

Scapegoating occurs when one person is unfairly blamed for larger problems. This can happen in families, workplaces, or friend groups. Blaming only one person may temporarily reduce tension, but it doesn’t solve the real issue.

Smear campaigning involves spreading rumours or selective stories to damage another person’s reputation. In the age of social media, this can happen very quickly. Responsible communication and fact-checking are important before speaking negatively about others. This is often done out of jealousy or egoism. 

Hoovering refers to attempts to pull someone back into a relationship or situation after they have tried to step away. Sudden emotional messages, promises of change, or dramatic gestures may appear after a long period of unhealthy behaviour. Sometimes relationships genuinely improve, but meaningful change is usually shown through steady actions over time rather than temporary emotional intensity.

The good news is that awareness to such behavioral patterns itself is a strong first step. Most people are capable of improving communication when they recognise unhealthy patterns. Kindness, cautiousness, accountability, honest conversations, and respectful boundaries can make relationships healthier and more peaceful in everyday life.

Smart Powerpoint Presentation Skills

Powerpoint Presentation Etiquettes 

What is PowerPoint etiquette?

Effective PowerPoint etiquette focuses on communicating with the audience in easier ways, respecting the time factor and their reception. A well designed presentation supports the speaker, improves understanding, and creates a lasting academic impact.

Need for PowerPoint Etiquette

1. Ensures clarity in communication of complex ideas.
2. Avoids information overload for the audience.
3. Enhances academic professionalism.
4. Supports structured and smooth delivery.
5. Improves audience engagement and retention.

Preparation and Planning

1. Practice mock presentation to maintain proper timing.
2. Arrive early and check equipment such as projector, audio, and lighting.
3. keep a backup copy in a storage device and email.
4. Organise content in a logical sequence.

Slide Design Principles

Content

1. Follow the five by five rule (a slide should have no more than 5 lines, and each line should have less than 5 words).
2. Limit the amount of text to minimum on each slide.
3. Use key points instead of full sentences.

Font and Readability

1. Use simple fonts such as Arial or Calibri or TNR.
2. Maintain minimum font size of 24 for body text.
3. Ensure readability from the last row.
4. Don’t make it very flashy, b/w is suitable combination. 

Make it pictorial 

1. Prefer images, charts, and diagrams over long text.
2. Use visuals to simplify complex data in story form.

Some consistency 

1. Maintain the same background, color scheme, and font style with slide numbers with good contrast. 
2. Use a uniform template throughout the presentation.
3. Put additional data or calculations at the end in the form of hidden slides, if required during discussion. 
4. Keep some full length references ready for the question answer session.

Avoid Distractions

1. Mostly avoid use of animations and transitions.
2. Avoid sounds and unnecessary multimedia.

Delivery Etiquette

Engagement with Audience

1. Maintain eye contact.
2. Use appropriate body language, never show your back and face the audience instead of the screen.
3. Be humble, respectful and learned during defence. 

Use of Slides

1. Do not read directly the slides.
2. Explain charts and graphs clearly with interpretation in simplest language.
3. Use slides as support, not as a script.
4. Highlight the important findings or observations.

Time Management

1. Respect the allotted time.
2. Balance explanation, divide time for every slide and  progression.
3. Keep a flow and connectivity when you transit from previous slide to the next.

Conclusion

A well structured PowerPoint presentation enhances both teaching and learning. By maintaining clarity, simplicity, and professionalism, students can communicate ideas effectively and leave a meaningful impact.

DNA to Data

Nature to Tech-feature

     History tells us that discovery often lies rooted in ancient culture and nature. Many technological innovations are inspired by natural phenomena that serve as the original source of ideas. Some of the world’s best inventions have emerged from biomimicry, the practice of learning from nature’s designs.

Engineers developed nanorobots that mimic the helical movement of bacterial flagella, enabling them to navigate complex human blood vessels for targeted drug delivery. Velcro was invented after observing how burrs clung to a dog’s fur, revealing tiny hooks that could grip fabric loops. Airplane wings and gliders were designed after studying the wings of birds. Wind turbines were inspired by the structure of humpback whale fins. The design of the Japanese bullet train was modified after observing the kingfisher’s long beak, allowing it to move from tunnels with minimal noise. Even the portable toilet iThrone mimics how plants draw moisture from soil and release it through leaves, evaporating most human waste without energy. Antivirus software draws inspiration from the human body’s defense mechanisms, detecting and neutralizing digital threats. Organic electrochemical transistors are used to trap ions, mimicking the long-term plasticity of biological synapses in human brain. 

Even social media algorithms reflect patterns similar to human mental processing.

But what exactly is an algorithm?
An algorithm is a finite and ordered set of well defined instructions used to solve a specific problem or perform a calculation. It acts like a recipe that takes input, processes it, and produces an output. Algorithms form the backbone of computer programming and logical decision making.
Interestingly, human thinking itself follows a natural sequence similar to UPDCA:

1. Understanding or observing the situation
2. Planning a course of action
3. Doing or implementing the plan
4. Checking and evaluating the results
5. Analysing and interpreting feedback to see whether the purpose is served and to what extent. 

The human mind processes situations in a structured, algorithmic manner. Artificial intelligence programming is inspired by this very intelligence. Yet AI represents only a fraction of human capability. Human intelligence carries dimensions gifted by nature such as intelligence quotient, emotional quotient, spiritual quotient, social quotient, and adversity quotient.

Although artificial intelligence has a long journey ahead, it has undeniably simplified many professional tasks. However, the original source of structured thinking, creativity, and wisdom remains the human mind, deeply connected to nature.

In the end, perhaps every invention is not merely a creation but a rediscovery. Nature has always been the silent teacher. Technology only translates what nature has already perfected. And the human mind remains the most sophisticated algorithm ever designed.

दव

एका साहित्यकाच्या घरात जन्माला येणे म्हणजे भरून आलेले आभाळ आणि त्याला प्रकाशाची किनार…

सतत श्रावण मास असल्याचा भास किंवा वसंत ऋतू च्या आगमाची आस. 

कवी कल्पनाशक्तीच्या शिखरावर असताना, किराण्याची यादी हातात मिळावी तसे घरातील ऋतू रंग बदलत असत.

व्यवहारी जग आणि आतील कवी मनाची तडजोड मला काही नवीन नव्हती. अशा सुखद भावनात्मक संघर्षाच्या वातावरणात मला गणित कोण शिकवणार? यावर गंभीरपणे विचार सुरू असतानाच, वडिलांचे साहित्यिक मित्र मंडळी घरी येत असे आणि ‘आपले गणित चुकले’ हे मला त्या वयात ही कळावे, कांद्याची भजी , फक्कड चहा आणि कोट्यात्मक विनोदाच्या लाटा…कुठले गणित आणि कोणती किराणा यादी? सगळं वाहून जायी.

मला ही अभ्यासाचा जास्त पुळका नव्हता. त्यामुळे वडिलांचे बोट धरून मी ही निघायचे. कधी गंगेवर, कधी सार्वजनिक वाचनालय, कधी वसंत व्याख्यानमाला, कधी काळाराम, कधी गोंदेश्वर, तर कधी कविवर्य तात्यासाहेबांच्या घरी. 

काकासाहेब वि. वा. शिरवाडकर, त्यांच्या नाशिकच्या घरी तसे एकटेच रहात असत. मोठ्या मनाच्या या विभूतीच्या घरातील खोल्या तशा लहान होत्या आणि अंगणात मी खेळत असे. आजही मला त्यांची खुर्ची, टेबल, बुक रॅक आणि त्यांचा पलंग आठवतो. बाकी सगळं पुसट आठवतय. 

अशाच एका भेटीत मी ‘ध्यास’ कवितेवर कुसुमाग्रजांची स्वाक्षरी घेतली. त्यांनी भरभरून आशीर्वाद दिले. 

सर्वांचे लाडके तात्यासाहेब आठवणींची शिदोरी देऊन पलीकडच्या प्रवासावर निघून गेले.

काही वर्षांनंतर मी त्यांना आमच्या कॉलेजच्या “कुसुमाग्रज “ हॉल बाहेर लावलेल्या एका फोटोत पाहिले, आणि मला लहानपणचे ते शांत निवांत क्षण आठवले, वृक्षाच्या पानावरील दव अनुभवावा तसे स्मरण झाले. मोठी माणसे त्यांच्या छोट्या छोट्या गोष्टीतून आयुष्य जगायची व लढायची ऊर्जा देऊन जातात. 

साहित्य महर्षी विष्णू वामन शिरवाडकर तथा तात्यासाहेब आज त्यांच्या जयंती निमित्ताने “मराठी भाषा गौरव दिन व विश्व मराठी साहित्य संमेलनानिमित्त” प्रकर्षाने आठवले. त्यांचा सहवास व आशीर्वाद लाभले हे भाग्य नसे थोडके.

“आमुच्या कुला कुलात नांदते मराठी

येथल्या फुलाफुलात हासते मराठी

येथल्या दिशादिशात दाटते मराठी

येथल्या नगानगात गर्जते मराठी”

बोलतो मराठी… जाणतो मराठी…मानतो मराठी

Closed, unfinished or trapped?

 The geometry of our inner narratives!

Very small patches come together to solve the jigsaw of life. Our experiences too can be symbolically understood in simple forms in the diagram given above.

A half circle signifies a thought left midway, unimplemented, lacking foundation, an effort made with no closure. Such half-formed attempts consume energy and mental space. They must be identified, learned from, and consciously discarded, not repeated unconsciously and one should quickly move forward.

An incomplete or unprocessed circle represents something different. You tried your best. You reached far. You were almost at the finishing line, ready to taste the fruit but circumstances, limitations, or resilience fatigue stopped you. The effort remains suspended. You are left astonished, confused, and slightly unsettled. These are unprocessed tasks, incomplete emotional files, unfinished conversations. You can pause for a little-while, if necessary, but sooner have to let it go, signing off.

A complete circle signifies the art of finishing. It reflects closure, the discipline of concluding, detaching, and freeing mental space to initiate something new. A completed circle is a file consciously closed and placed into the mental shelf.

Then comes the circle with an arrow which is the vicious loop. Here, you are not simply unfinished; you are trapped. It is a repetitive pattern of thought or experience. You wish to detach, yet you unknowingly return to it. Unlike an incomplete circle that allows you to leave it, restart a new one, a vicious loop keeps you rotating in the same emotional orbit. It drains awareness and subtly creates dependency. It’s vital to break this pattern.

Pause and reflect.

What kind of circles you currently are dealing in your life?

Is it halfway? Or Unprocessed? Or  A vicious loop?

Or completed circle which is identified, sorted, treated, and concluded?

If necessary, pen it down, sort them as per types of patterns in the diagram, decide the line of action, start implementing with awareness and feel the results. 

Our journey becomes lighter when we recognise the shape of our experiences.

The Barfi Moments!

   

     In our day-to-day hurry-worry life, we often miss the smallest emotional taps,  the “barfi moments” These spur-of-the-moment joys are light, they melt quickly, but their sweetness lingers, just like the taste of a small square of barfi. 

A barfi moment could be as simple as exchanging a glance and a smile at work, acknowledging each other’s presence, or sharing food that a colleague loves. It could be expressing a thoughtful view over tea, noticing the stress lines on someone’s face, or recognising the quiet weight of a low mood. It might be understanding that rules can always be remade, but the fragile state of the mind needs gentle care. Sometimes it is nothing more than a kind word, a compliment, or a line of credit for work done well.

The smaller the gesture, the lighter the mode, and the sweeter the barfi. Often underestimated and dismissed as empty highs, these little sparks are in fact what soothe us, just like a spray of joy across the day. Aren’t they like small, colorful butterflies fluttering around us on a sunny day with a clear sky above?

They actually make up our days. And isn’t life, after all, about the present moment we live? These barfi moments aren’t sold anywhere. They ask only for a little extra mindfulness  to notice, to tap, and to breathe them in.

माझी सांगाती

आज आषाढ महिन्यातील देवशयनी एकादशीच्या दिवशी सुट्टी असल्यामुळे मी लवकर उठून स्नान आणि योगा केला. अंगणात सडा टाकून कोल्हम रांगोळी काढली. देवपूजा करून आम्ही फराळ बनवले. आईने माझ्या आवडीचा खुसखुशीत फराळी चिवडा घरीच बनवला होता. तो चिवडा खात असताना मला आईबद्दल काय वाटतं, हे आज मी तिला सांगितलं. माझी आई म्हणून नव्हे, तर एक व्यक्ती म्हणून तिचा स्वभाव प्रेमात पडावा असाच आहे. दुसऱ्याचा विचार करणारी, त्यांचं म्हणणं शांतपणे आणि एकचित्ताने ऐकून घेऊन मग योग्य तोच सल्ला देणारी. बोलण्यापेक्षा कृतीवर भर देणारी, आणि बोलायचंच असेल तर फार विचारपूर्वक शब्दांची निवड करणारी. दुसऱ्याची देहबोली, चेहऱ्यावरील हावभाव टिपून पुढील संवाद-सूत्र ठरवणारी. एखादा जर फार नकारात्मक दृष्टिकोन घेऊन आला असेल, तर आई त्याला सकारात्मक बाजू दाखवत असे. आईचं म्हणणं किंवा निष्कर्ष कधीच दुसऱ्यांच्या म्हणण्यावर अवलंबून नसते. तिचं विश्लेषणात्मक कौशल्य, म्हणजेच माहितीचं विश्लेषण करून निष्कर्ष काढण्याची आणि समस्या सोडवण्याची क्षमता, जबरदस्त आहे. त्यात संवेदनशीलता आणि अंतर्ज्ञानाची अचूक जोड तिला लाभली आहे. हे विश्लेषणात्मक कौशल्य आईला व्यवहारात, नोकरीत, व्यवसायात, नातेसंबंधात, आर्थिक, सामाजिक आणि इतर अनेक बाबतीत मदतीचं ठरतं. आईचं हे कौशल्य इतकं विकसित होण्यामागे लहानपणापासूनची वाचनाची आवड, तारुण्यात घरातील व्यवसायाचे अकाउंट्स सांभाळण्याची मिळालेली संधी आणि नोकरीतील क्वालिटी व ऑडिटचा बक्कळ अनुभव हे सर्व कारणीभूत आहेत. आयुष्यात आलेल्या अडचणी आणि काही कटू अनुभवांमुळे तिच्यात दूरदृष्टी आणि तार्किक विचारपद्धती रूजली गेली आहे. त्यामुळे एक व्यक्ती म्हणून तिचा सर्वांगीण विकास उत्कृष्टरीत्या झालेला आहे. याची मला जाणीव आहे आणि अभिमानही वाटतो. जसे आपण आपल्या सहकाऱ्यांची आणि वरिष्ठांची कधीतरी प्रशंसा करतो, स्तुती करतो, कधी एखाद्या कार्यासाठी मदत व्हावी म्हणून विनंती करतो आणि गरज पडल्यास, काही चुकल्यास माफीही मागतो, तशीच प्रशंसा आपण आपल्या आई-वडिलांची, जोडीदाराची किंवा मुलांचीही कधी करून पहावी. ते आनंदी तर होतीलच, पण त्यांना पुढील आयुष्यासाठी सकारात्मक ऊर्जा मिळेल. आज मी मनातलं आईला सांगितल्यानंतर ती स्मितहसली. काहीच बोलली नाही, पण तिच्या डोळ्यांत, हावभावांत तिला झालेला आनंद आणि समाधान मला दिसलं आणि ते मौल्यवान वाटलं. आई जास्त बोलत नाही, पण तिच्या कृतीतून शिकायला तर नक्कीच मिळतं… आणि आधारही मिळतो. म्हणूनच आज वारकऱ्यांना पंढरपूरला विठ्ठलाचे दर्शन मिळाल्यावर जो विलक्षण आनंद होईल तशीच काहीशी अनुभूती मला मिळाली आहे.

जेथे जातो तेथे तू माझा सांगाती, चालविसी हाती धरुनिया,
चालो वाटे आम्ही तुझाची आधार, चालविसी भार सवे माझा,
बोलो जाता बरळ करीसी ते नीट, नेली लाज धीट केलों देवा,
तुका म्हणे आता खेळतो कौतूके, जालें तुझे सुख अंतर्बाही ।।

जय हरी विठ्ठल!

विठू माऊली… माऊली विठू ।।

Braids and Bread Rolls

                        My kaleidoscope!

My childhood was a kaleidoscope, and you were at the heart of every color and pattern.

From home to school and back home again, every moment was spent with you. You were not just my father, you were my teacher, my playmate, and my guide. We shared not just a house, but a classroom, a stage, and a life.

I still remember our little mimicry sessions, where we’d imitate relatives and burst into laughter. Your presence would light up every family gathering. The poems you wrote, the plays you directed, we, Aai and I, were always the first ones to watch, to smile, and to clap.

You never quite perfected it, but every morning you’d patiently braid my hair into plaits before school. That was love, steady, and full of effort. 

Our vacations were always together because we belonged to the same school, you as a teacher, I as your student. It was a bond few get to experience. The classroom never really ended, because the lessons continued at home, in the form of stories, values, and wisdom.

You invented so many indoor games, back in a time when there was no YouTube, no online tutorials, not even Google. I especially remember the matchbox game, you’d flip it and the goal was to make it land standing upright. It was simple, creative, and so much fun. You taught me chess too, not just the moves, but the strategy, the patience, and the power of thinking ahead.

And yes, it was you who lifted me up every single day so the wound I had from that accident could be cleaned and dressed. You stood beside me, hand in hand, every time the bandage was changed.

You introduced me to Marathi dramas, poetry recitations, films, and garden strolls. You wrote my speeches and prepared me for elocution contests.  Then on the final day, you would lovingly accept my wish of you not attending it because I felt too conscious. That was your quiet strength, very supportive without conditions.

You taught me how to manage money, how to deal with banks, and how to handle life. Our Maggi and bread roll sandwich parties, just you and me when Aai was at work, were tiny, fulfilled celebrations. The taste still lingers on my tongue.

Our evening walks weren’t just about exercise. They were about sharing stories, talking about life, and learning values I didn’t even realize I was absorbing.

I can’t remember a single conversation with you that didn’t leave a mark. You had this rare ability, either to make people laugh till their stomachs hurt or to say something so simple and heartfelt that it settled straight into the heart.

That last night, in the final hours before you left us forever, when I was sleeping near your bed, head resting close to you, you gently patted my head. That soft touch said it all: “I am here. I’ll always be here. Take care of yourself. And remember, your mother is an incredible and extraordinary woman.”

And so, you remain,

In every braid I make,

In every sandwich I toast,

In every poem I write,

In every truth I live.

And trust me the ‘the last pat remained’ in the form of a daughter’s memories of love, learning, and letting go.

मिशन टिकली

 ‘टिकली’ तर टिकली, ती ही टिकली! 

साधारण ३० वर्षांपूर्वीची ही गोष्टं आहे, माझ्या आयुष्यात जे घडले ते आज तुमच्या बरोबर शेयर करते. मी ज्या शाळेत होते ती एक ख्रिश्चन मिशनरी शाळा आहे, अत्यंत प्रतिष्ठित, आंतरराष्ट्रीय दर्जाचं शिक्षण तेव्हा देत असे आणि विद्यार्थ्यांचा सर्वांगीण विकास होण्यासाठी प्रयत्नं करत असे. तेव्हा फारशा शाळा नव्हत्याच मुळात, ही घराजवळ होती आणि माझे वडील ही ह्याच शाळेत मराठी भाषेचे शिक्षक होते, त्यामुळे सोयीची होती. पण शाळेतील काही नियम, देशाबाहेरील मिशनरी संस्थांकडून आलेले असावेत कदाचित, तदापी ते स्वीकारणे जरा आम्हाला कठीण जात असे. त्यापैकी एक नियम म्हणजे मुलींना कपाळावर टिकली लावण्यास मनाई! तशी ही शाळा सर्व धर्मांच्या आणि जातींच्या विद्यार्थ्यांसाठी खुली होती, त्यामुळे हा नियम विद्यार्थी आणि काही शिक्षकांना मान्य नव्हता. इतर काही मुली आणि मी एकत्र आलो, आम्हाला काही शिक्षकांचा पाठिंबा होताच, आणि एकत्रितपणे आम्ही या नियमाविरुद्ध तटस्थ उभं राहिलो. बंदी असूनही आम्ही कपाळावर रोज टिकली लावली, काहींनी गोलाकारात गंध लावला, अगदी निर्भयपणे. असे बरेच आठवडे गेलेत. मी तेव्हा लहान होते, त्यामुळे वरच्या एडमिनिस्ट्रेशन मधे नक्की काय घडलं ते अर्थातच मला काही उमगले नाही, किंबहुना चर्चा झाल्या असाव्यात, आणि अखेरीस ह्या नियमाचा फडशा पाडण्यात आला. त्यानंतरच्या काळात मात्र आम्हाला पुन्हा टिकली लावण्यास कोणीही मज्जाव केला नाही.

मी टिकलीला जशी चिकटले तशीच टिकलीही माझ्यावर टिकून राहिली. माझ्या आयुषात संकल्परूपी टिकली प्रतीकात्मक ठरली, असा संकल्प जो योग्य आहे आणि जो कुठल्याही परिस्थितीत पूर्णत्वास न्यायाचा.

मी दहावीत उत्तम गुणांनी उत्तीर्ण झाले, तेव्हा शाळा सुटली आणि पुढे मी गोखले एज्युकेशन सोसायटीच्या बिटको कॉलेजमध्ये विज्ञान शाखा निवडली. माझ्या शाळेतील बहुतेक मैत्रिणींनी कॉमर्स घेतलं होतं, त्यामुळे मी येथे एकटी पडले होते, एका वेगळ्याच वाटेवर. बारावी जेमतेम पास झाले आणि पुढे मी गोखले एज्युकेशन सोसायटीच्याच आरवायके सायन्स कॉलेज मधे बॅचलर ऑफ सायन्स च्या डिग्री साठी प्रवेश घेतला. कालांतराने मला मायक्रोबायोलॉजी विषय खूपच आवडू लागला, श्रेय अर्थात त्या काळातील शिक्षकांनाच आणि वाचनालयातील पुस्तकांना जाते. पदवी घेत असतानाच्या शेवटच्या वर्षी माझ्या वडिलांना एक असाध्य आजार झाला. त्याच काळात पुणे विद्यापीठात मायक्रोबायोलॉजी विभागात पदव्युत्तर शिक्षणासाठी पहिल्याच गुणवत्ता यादीत माझे नाव झळकले. मात्र घरच्यांचे म्हणणे होते की मी 'कमवा आणि शिका' योजनेअंतर्गत पुढील शिक्षण घ्यावे. माझ्या कुटुंबाचे आर्थिक गणित वडिलांच्या उपचारां भोवती फिरत असल्याकारणाने विस्कळीत झाले होते, त्यामुळे पुण्यात शिक्षण घेणं तेव्हा आव्हानात्मक होतं. ठरल्यानुसार, मी विद्यापीठाच्या 'कमवा आणि शिका' योजनेत नाव नोंदवलं. मास्टर्स इन मायक्रोबायोलॉजी च्या पहिल्या वर्षी मी परदेशी विद्यार्थ्यांच्या वैद्यकीय प्रमाणपत्र विभागात सहाय्यक म्हणून काम केलं. दुसऱ्या वर्षी मुलींच्या मेसमध्ये टोकन वाटपाचं काम केलं. मला तासाला १५ रुपये मिळत असे. या पैशात दोन वेळचं जेवण एडजस्ट झाले, पण नाश्ता एडजस्ट होऊ शकला नाही. रविवारी मेसमध्ये फीस्ट असल्याकारणाने रात्रीचं जेवण नसायचं, तेव्हा मी एक तर ५ रुपयांचा वडापाव किवा पार्ले बिस्किट खायची किंवा कधी कधी उपाशीच झोपत असे. मित्र-मैत्रिणींनो, मी काही UPSC किंवा MPSC ची तयारी करत नव्हते, म्हणून माझ्या आयुष्यातील या संघर्षांविषयी पुस्तक लिहिण्याचं कधीच मनात आलं नव्हतं. पण हाच संघर्ष पुढे Ph.D.च्या दरम्यानही सुरूच राहिला. डॉक्टर ऑफ फिलोसोफी साठी मी माझा आवडीचाच विषय निवडला, पण त्याला कुठला निधी किवा आर्थिक पाठबळ नव्हते आणि पितृछत्र हरपले होते त्यामुळे परिस्थितीच्या झळांचा सामना करावा लागला. म्हणूनच मी, मांजरी-हडपसरमधील एका नामांकित कॉलेज मधे अभ्यागत प्राध्यापक म्हणून काम केलं आणि Ph.D. पूर्ण केली. पीएचडी मधील माझ्या नाविन्यपूर्ण संशोधनासाठी भारत सरकारच्या IAMM ने मला सुवर्ण पदक देऊन सन्मानित केले. आर्थिक कोंडी होतीच त्यामुळे मी लागलीच गोखले एजुकेशन सोसाइटीच्या कॉलेज मधे प्राध्यापिकेची भूमिका स्वीकारली आणि तेव्हापासून आजही वर्गातील माझ्या प्रत्येक तासाचे मी सिंहावलोकन करतेच व स्वतःत सुधारणाही घडून आणते. हीच निष्ठा आणि ह्या प्रामाणिकपणामुळे कोविड च्या काळात मी आणि माझ्या टीम ने एक लाख ४० हजार रुग्णांचे सैंपलच्या चाचण्या बिनचूक करून दिल्यात. २४ तासात रिपोर्टिंग झाल्याकारणाने, रुग्णांवर उपचारही पटकन होऊ शकले, अनेकांचे प्राण वाचलेत. मार्ग तसा अवघड होता पण त्यात अचूकता होती, “because harder right was always preferred over easier wrong”.

तरीही, आजूबाजूचे अनेक लोकं सहज आणि चुकीचे मार्ग निवडून आयुष्यात स्थिर आणि ‘यशस्वी’ झालेले मी पाहिलं, आजही पाहते आहे. पण या सगळ्या अनुभवांमधून मी एक महत्त्वाचा धडा घेतला- सहज-सोपं आयुष्य कुणालाही मिळू शकतं, पण अर्थपूर्ण आयुष्य धाडसातून उभं राहतं. मी जे निवडलं ते सोपं नव्हतं, पण ते मूल्याधिष्ठित होतं, स्वाभिमानाने भरलेलं होतं, आणि खऱ्या अर्थाने ते "माझं" होतं. यातून बरच शिकायला मिळाले, जे आता मला शिकवताना ही कामी येतय. 

कठीण वाट निवडल्यामुळे आयुष्यही सतत संघर्षांच्या आणि कठीण प्रसंगांच्या लाटांवर हेलकावे खात राहणार, हेही तितकेच खरे! कपाळावरच्या टिकलीचा संघर्षाचा प्रवास काही संपला नाही, न झुकता माझ्याबरोबर ती ही ठामपणे उभी आहे, माझ्या अस्थित्वेची जाणीव करून देणारी ती सहचर आहे.

Selfie to Soulfie

A Cultural Shift in Self-Portrayal

It’s been more than two decades since the word selfie was coined, originating in Australia and in 2013, it was announced as the “Word of the Year” by the Oxford English Dictionary. Around the same time, selfie culture and solo travelling began rising in popularity, often going hand in hand. The smartphone industry quickly caught on, with front-facing camera technology advancing rapidly to meet the new demand. Suddenly, users were more interested in the clarity of the front camera than the back, marking a significant shift in user preferences.

Smartphone brands like Oppo gained immense popularity, particularly among women, for their selfie-optimized features. Samsung, OnePlus, and later, Nothing, co-evolved to cater to this camera-centric demand. As the tourism industry flourished, so did the race to build phones with high-quality cameras. As camera technology progressed, so did the way people shared their lives. People no longer just traveled, they documented their experiences, initially through platforms like Orkut and Facebook, where photos were shared as posts. Later, these moments found more dynamic expression through Instagram stories and, eventually, reels.

This transformation wasn’t just technological, it was psychological and cultural. Social media turned everyday users into the protagonists of their own narratives. Ordinary moments were dramatized and shared, often mimicking a celebrity lifestyle. Many did, in fact, gain fame through these platforms, especially those with the creativity and talent to capture attention in the form of likes and views.

The selfie era marked a shift from interpersonal interaction to self-presentation. For some, selfies became a tool for building confidence and self progress. For others, the pursuit turned obsessive, and in extreme cases, bordered on narcissism. As the trend matured, it diversified: mirror selfies, gym selfies, couple selfies, pet selfies, food selfies, content selfies, the list kept growing.

This hyper-focus on external appearance, on curating the perfect portrait for the world, gradually started taking its toll. With so much energy directed outward, there was little left for inward reflection. The soul, in majority cases, was left out of the frame.

As with any cultural wave, saturation eventually sets in. And now, the selfie seems to be giving way to a deeper, more meaningful alternative: the soulfie. Unlike the selfie, which fixates on how we look, the soulfie invites us to explore and express how we feel and who we truly are beneath the surface. It’s less about framing the face and more about revealing the soul.

Each one has a self so probably expressing oneself isn’t unnatural. Perhaps, the shift from selfie to soulfie marks the beginning of a more conscious, mindful era of self-expression, where how we see ourselves finally matters more than how we are seen. A soulfie is not just a photograph, but a pause, a moment to turn inward through practices like meditation, journaling, blogging or simply being present with oneself. It’s an invitation to reflect, to reconnect with one’s inner world, and to express not just the face, but the feeling. In this evolving culture, the soulfie becomes a mirror to the soul, quiet, authentic, and deeply human.

Harder right over the easier wrong!

Recently I happened to meet a school mate and we both remembered an incident, let me share with you. It began when I was a child who went to a convent (Christian) school, about 30 years ago. Back then, the number of schools was limited, and this one had an international reputation, since its head branch worked outside India. It offered high-quality education and ensured the multifaceted development of its students.

However, a few rules, originating from missionary sources outside the country, were hard to accept. One such rule forbade girls from wearing a tikli (a circular dot on the forehead). While the school welcomed students of all religions and castes, this rule was met with resistance, not just from students, but also from a few teachers.

Along with a few other girls and the support of some teachers, I stood united against this rule. Despite being told not to, we continued to wear the tikli fearlessly. I was too young to understand what happened at the administrative level, but a few days later, discussions must have taken place. The rule was revoked, and we were never stopped from wearing the tikli again.

That small, symbolic act became a lifelong metaphor for me. Because I stuck to the tikli, the tikli stayed stuck to me. It came to represent holding onto what is right, no matter the circumstance.

After school, I chose the science stream in Gokhale Education Society’s Bytco College for my 11th and 12th grades. I was an outlier, most of my school friends had chosen commerce. I was fascinated by microbiology and went on to graduate in the same subject from Gokhale Education Society’s RYK Science College.

In the final year of my graduation, my father was diagnosed with an incurable liver disorder. Around the same time, I was selected for postgraduate studies at the Department of Microbiology, Pune University, in the very first merit list. I was allowed to pursue it on one suggestion: that I enroll in the ‘Earn and Learn’ scheme. Most of our finances were directed towards my father’s treatment, so affording my education in Pune was nearly impossible.

Under the scheme, I worked to support myself. In the first year, I assisted in the medical certificate section for foreign students, health centre. In the second year, I distributed tokens in the girls' refectory. I earned ₹15 per hour. It was enough to afford two meals a day, but not breakfast. On Sundays, there was no dinner in the hostel, I would either have a ₹5 vada pav or a packet of Parle biscuits, or sometimes, nothing at all.

I wasn't preparing for UPSC or MPSC exams, so I never thought of writing a book about my struggles. But the struggles continued, into my PhD as well. I chose a research topic close to my heart, even though it received no funding. To survive, I worked as a visiting lecturer in Manjri, Hadapsar, and completed my PhD alongside. I then worked as a lecturer in Gokhale Education Society’s college. I maintained a habit of reviewing every lecture of mine and correcting the flaws or gaps in it. With this precision and honesty, we were also involved in testing samples for covid. In the pandemic we accurately analysed and reported 1 lakh 40 thousand samples in a government hospital. 

Throughout this journey, I’ve consistently attempted the harder right. And yet, I have often watched others settle comfortably, smartly, even by choosing the easier wrong.

But here's what I’ve learned: comfort may come easily, but courage creates meaning. The road I chose wasn’t paved with ease or certainty, but with values, resilience, and self-respect. Every obstacle, every hungry night, every difficult decision stitched together the fabric of a life I can call my own, with pride, my skin! 

A few people don’t settle for easy wrongs, they choose the harder right. Life, in turn, tunes itself to a frequency of constant struggles and hardships for such individuals. They still don’t give up.

Because sometimes, sticking to your tikli is not about tradition, it's about identity, conviction, and the quiet strength to stand tall in a world that often asks you to bend.

Fidelity is our फ़ितरत!

 

While the world has been judging over the cover of the book, the confidence, presentation skill and the showbiz side of it, our biological inclination has always been about proofreading and rectification. How meticulously our body has the organised system of tissues and how every tissue has the smallest cellular unit in biochemical conversation with itself and each other. The energy and temperament of our individual cell represents the whole of us. Cell is clever and wise when it comes to storing and recruiting its energy for a cause. It invests the energy based on cautionary measures and maintenance. Just the way we work, save money and expend it, our cell invests and utilises the energy but wisely. We humans, have a schedule to follow each day and we plan calculated months without really reevaluating ourselves for the moment which is gone. Our cell, on the contrary, counter checks every minute activity going on inside it, it works, supervises and audits every second of a process happening. Our genetically inherited particle, DNA, doubles up by the process of replication under a proctor-enabled system. The coordinator is the polymerase enzyme with a team of small proteins assisting the crew to cook the original form of DNA, proofread it and correct it in case of any mistake. Fidelity is the goal during making of a DNA, transcribing it to RNA and finally translating it to proteins. Every step is monitored seamlessly and paused briskly incase of any abnormalities. Cell is always open to learn its mistakes, correct the minor and major errors, relax and move on, keeping a memory of it and not grudges. This is the basic फ़ितरत of every cell. It’s when we humans overthink, the toxic species and stress hormones accumulate in our body compelling our cells to quit its regular job temporarily and  divert lot of its energy to express the fox family genes meant to control the stress pathways. The continuous stress and hence the limited energy also probably holds a gun on the cell’s head and forces it to walkthrough the errors in regular processes ultimately causing lifestyle disorders and diseases like diabetes, hormonal imbalances, obesity and cancer. The key lies in the balancing act. Internal bathing, mind training, yogic practices, meditation and mental hygiene. Anti-stress decorum in our mind and inside every cell will represent as whole of you. If the cell is happy, the individual body is happy. The status of a cell represents the status of the entire body. 

Fewer is better

This was our 12th annual visit to Gharkul, a home for the disabled at Nasik, to celebrate birthday of our late buddy Sumit. This time coordination had been a bit difficult since kaku who is the incharge, was out of communication. She came to settle further plan for Gharkul girls in the time span between the 2 chemotherapy cycles. Her meeting was on and I was waiting downstairs. I chose not to disturb her and let her know my presence, and wait until the caretaker thought it was the best time to inform her. Meanwhile I gazed at the lovely collection of plants outdoor. A Gharkul girl was trained to attend the visitors and hence she would come to me to and fro, offering water, and tea and just a round with a friendly stare and would ask me to enter my name in the visitors book and would come again for something or the other. Some lady guards were cutting bamboos to make a bouquet of it. There were many handcrafted products kept for sale. I offered the donation on behalf of my friend circle and received a call from kaku. I went upstairs and greeted her for the new year by touching her feet. In a big auditorium, I and kaku sat next to each other on a sofa, munching on the pieces of apple. I had come just to be a listener. She told me about her chemo sessions and emphasised on the fact, how the true relations is the real estate of life. She continued that, it’s okay if you may not make new friends or relations but it is so so important to keep time and commitment for the pre-existing people or the inner circle, or line in life. It is so important to offer justice by giving time, care and attention to the handful of already existing relations in life. Maintenance, repair and revival of the older relations is always preferable over making new relations. Making new relations, promising the older relations and finally finding time for none will make our life miserable. Keep the energy invested and channelised for that tested and tried older bonds of life. In human relations, quantity will not go along with the quality. I understood her say and I continued as a listener. When silence starts speaking more than words, the conversation goes beyond speech and lots of feelings though unsaid are yet conveyed. With confidence in my heart and light in my eyes, I bid her bye as I logged out in the visitor’s book. 

माया: A Tailor-made Concept

 

They say, a goal without a plan is just a wish and also a very good plan, but no work is a plan wasted. A plan if made very hard and fast, can generate a peer pressure, psychologically and eventually, physically too. If we make a plan using a pencil, then there is a flexibility of erasing and replacing a part of a plan. So if we keep a margin, then we get a scope of modification and it also relaxes our mind with an opportunity for creative thinking. Everyone should have this plus or minus possibility of deviation from a standard factor and why not? Even a tailor keeps a margin while stitching an outfit. Margin is the seam provided inside the garment after the stitching edge-line which gives the flexibility for any kind of alteration in our body in future. Every blouse has a minimum of 3-4 marginal stitches allowable from the edge-line, it is called as ‘maya’. Such a beautiful concept which allows you to simply fit-in with no judgements and looking-down phenomenon. Peaceful psychology loves back-up or alternate plans and this leads to minimum hormonal disturbances. The changing body seasons with pre, post menstrual stages, the peri, the menopausal and the post menopausal phases, the teenage, the adolescence changes the physical structure too. Every change calls for concern and adaptation, hence traditionally the concept of ‘maya’, margin has been adopted for the blouses. It’s like saying, don’t worry, it’s normal to have that scope of a change, you can still wear what you have, not only fabric but also smile, confidence and beauty. Keeping maya is normalising a situation which is undergoing a change. It’s okay to gain weight that your body can effortlessly carry. There is nothing that one can compare with. As far as you are eating homemade food and homing good food-for-thoughts in mind, with reasonable movement of body-machine, nothing can disturb the peace of mind. If your mind is luggage free and psychologically cushioned with flexibility to accept the situation around, consistent implementation of productive and creative work will be the result.

The squiggly duckling!

Friends, I was invited as a guest speaker in a known college of Nasik. I was explaining MSc Microbiology students a technique which was worked upon by David Deamer as a result of close collaboration between industrial and research fundings. It took him 25 years of a process to come up with this working model and it was named as nanopore sequencing. This technology allows sequencing the DNA base-by-base. It seems the DNA squiggles due to obstruction created just as it’s strand passes in through a protein pore under the electrical influence, like a thread slides through the hole of a needle. Squiggle is a haphazard pattern developed just like a short line that curves and twists in a way that is characteristically unique as a result of getting exposed to some external factor. Our mind too has this ability of drawing such patterns. In clinical psychology the kind of squiggles scribbled on a paper depicts the status of a mind, whether scattered or focused. A pencil-and-paper technique used by English psychoanalyst Donald Woods Winnicott to help humans express their feelings and thoughts. The game is unstructured, allowing one to share the ideas freely. It has no rules, the journey is from subconscious mind to the surface of the paper. It depicts the state of the thoughts going in the mind. Doodles that include circles and curved lines depicts more relaxed mind whereas dots and random squiggles may represent confusion, ambiguity, or a lack of clarity, and the act of drawing them may be a way to organize or make sense of chaotic thoughts. Symbols represent intentional state whereas angles and lines represent anxiety, stressed situation. Like an action has a reaction, every thought is squiggly and there is a pattern to it. The way DNA in every living cell produces a squiggle pattern, macro form of our body and the mind also squiggles as a response or reaction to a situation. Squiggly lines suggest the middle-ground between direction and exploration. You may know where you need to go, but not how to get there. Angular zigzags are different. Their straight lines and sharp corners denote aggression or impatience, and are commonly associated with masculine traits. More the mesh and complexity of the thoughts, more complicated squiggle will be generated. Under a stressful condition, creativity switch gets off and every painful thought will give a characteristic, unique squiggle helpful in the psychoanalysis. It is said that regularly chanting the beej mantra (om chanting) reduces stress, anxiety, restlessness and promotes the calming effect. Healthy rhythmic heartbeat brings with it mindfulness and eventually, spiritual growth. Regular meditation reduces anxiety, post traumatic stress and squiggling. It optimises the rhythmic patterns of breathing and balances the thought process. One becomes sorted, focused, self-aware and concentrated. Meditation and om chanting is reported to decrease the toxic oxygen levels and maintain the length of chromosome endings, telomeres, thereby increasing the longevity. From the DNA to the cellular signals to the behavioural pattern of human, everything is so linked to each other. The status of one cell can represent the status of the entire body. Healthy cell is an identity of a healthy body.

A game changer: To be or not to be!

Mindset matters the most! 

Let us see what is the difference between the alpha and the beta kind of a mindset. Our mind is swinging like a pendulum between alpha and beta form majorly. Alpha is more about being alert, perceptive, relaxed, with an activity of taking charge of yourself, executing it and sticking more to being wise, then morality. Beta mindset is more of getting carried away with the flow, desiring a label of ‘the nice person’, full of anxiety, at times panic mode, and inflexibility in the thought process, more of the rigid kind internally though. 

It is okay if our mind inclines to swing towards the beta mindset, but far more important is taking charge of our mindset and guiding it towards the alpha mindset.     Alpha mindset helps us control our thought process, tracking it on to a strong mindset, with adaptation and stable evolution. In ability to take responsibilities, constant tendency of acting as victims, waiting for the world to tell what to do, and what not are associated with the beta type of mindset. This kind of mindset leads to depression and inability to coexist. To spark the beta form into an alpha kind of a mindset should be our goal. Alpha mindset gets developed and maintained over a time period. Alpha mindset is a winning mindset, a lifestyle and a constant way to life. It is about releasing from something that is holding you back, it is about widening your horizons and possibilities and it is about coming out of your comfortable zone. It is about taking chances and not giving up. It is about realising that there is always choices, and the option which we choose mindfully and attentively will mould not only our mindset, but also our life. Alpha mindset is about being calm, but also alert, exploring your full potential, it’s about human maintenance, it’s about charging relations, it’s about finding your mission and at the same time understanding the dangers of the modern life. It definitely has nothing to do with aggression rather it has something to do with meditation and special breathing techniques (pranayama). It is about delimiting your thoughts at the same time understanding the restriction of limits.

The Co-passenger

 

It was a lazy, foggy morning and I was running behind the time. A quick dry-fruit-Laddu breakfast and a little yoghurt was enough for me to make a hasty start. I murmured a fast track gratitude line to God, curled up my hair,  clutched it up and stepped down the staircase as I fixed my shoes on my way. A loud bye to mommy as I bang the ‘C’ shaped lock on the gate. The sound distressed my neighbouring aunty as she slided her window glass to watch me disappear. I walked briskly, crossed the road and stuffed myself inside the autorickshaw, like a smashed potato inside a bun. The rickshaw stopped at a few locations where initially a teen got down, then the senior citizen couple got down and that’s when a lady got in. The rickshaw headed towards the college that I work in as a professor. The rickshaw driver looked at me through the front mirror until I gave him a stern glare. I pulled on my mask with the threat of catching flue virus in air. Through the puddles and pits on the road, rickshaw managed to go further, sometimes avoiding them and at times bouncing back. There were signals where we stopped and I happen to realise that people especially men of all the ages were peeping and staring inside the rickshaw. I stopped my thought process and a revision of my ‘things to do’ list, and looked at the front mirror if all was well on my face. I shrugged off my observation and got back on my thinking track. Soon due to traffic we slowed down and repeatedly I found men including the traffic police looking inside the rickshaw without a blink of an eye. I became super conscious and uncomfortable about this and it started bothering me now. As all the masculine looks pooled inside our rickshaw, I managed to look at the co-passenger sitting next to me. She was a girl in teens, wearing red salwar kurta with a beige dupatta having a jari border. She had a milky fair tone and flawless skin. Her big golden jhumkas had shining stones studded and hair were bleached golden. She had worn laakh bangles with flashy mirror work. Her eyes were lined thickly with a black kajal and she pressed her lips to signify the urgency of her own. She wore a very flashy make up and her lipstick was super dark maroon with a brown outline. She looked overdone in her appearance in the daylight. Her body language was extraordinarily familiar to men and by now my 6th sense had learnt that she was none other than a sex worker. She was in hurry to catch for her schedule aligned by her for a basic livelihood. As the multidirectional incidental glares fell on her, her vibes refracted them back with a shield of ignorance and indifference. As I was solving this jigsaw of observations, she asked the driver to stop the rickshaw, while getting down hurriedly, she placed a roll of currency on his palm and walked into a direction hurriedly. Me, the driver, the autorickshaw and the strong lingering rosé fragrance of my co-passenger headed further on the road ‘not-so-busy’. Every rising day comes with a haste, a plan to accomplish and a timeline which places every single human on a common, unbiased platform. Every co-passenger has a storyline, a deadline, a timeline and a lifeline, which is unmatched. 

Magic of Baby Steps!

 

Small steps have big significance in reaching mightiest goals. When the challenges are understood at first place, broken down into chunks that are sizeably digestible, it becomes easier to take actions. Taking baby steps helps reduce anxiety and panic mode. Baby steps help us avoid overwhelming situations in stressful times. Rather worrying on the intensity of the goal, we learn to focus on the very small steps taken consistently and consciously towards the goal. Small progress every day boosts in loads of confidence in us. It improves the quality inch by inch and step by step. Micro planning and keeping up with the movement every single day is the key. Rather than heaping and wondering where to start, and banging into a day-night stand to meet the goal, it is mindful to break your work in small tasks easy to achieve on a constant basis. Mini victories are great propellers towards success. Taking baby steps also justify being gentle and nurturing to yourself. Pausing and slowing down although underrated, is something that makes a difference. Mini victories are simple, real and quickly achievable. Mini victory helps us achieve the mini goal which is a vital part of the major goal. The small habits that we inculcate with discipline and dedication help us get in a win-win state. Norman Schwarzkopf says, “the more we sweat in peace, the less we bleed in war”. This is the magic and joy of mini steps for whichever target we aim to accomplish in our lives.

My first love!

 

पद्माकर रामचंद्र भावसार (01.05.1954 to 22.01.2004) 

In these 20 years, since the time he has gone into another world, I have never expressed anything related to my father on a social platform. The reason is simple it being a very sensitive corner of my heart, difficult to put in words. But today I gather The strength and wisdom from my father And I have penned down a few words regarding him. The main reason why I write this is because it’s been two decades that physically he isn't around us and a number of people have been sharing thoughts related to him, like the relatives, the teachers from Saint Philomena, the students from so many batches of the school, his fellow mates from the writers group, his friends and all the people whom I don’t even know but he has happened to touch their lives in some or the other ways. In these 20 years I have been a listener to so many of the experiences shared by people regarding how he had stood beside them when the waters were troublesome. In these 20 years I and my mother have been breathing under the shade of the legacy that he left behind. The legacy of sharing, caring, helping, guiding, and simply being there with a true heart. This legacy is a new richness today when we long for good humans. Many of the people remember him for his light humour which would surface up exactly when the time wasn’t good, diluting the pain and increasing the strength. He volunteered a lot of  painstaking efforts for the Bhavsar क्षत्रिय समाज upbringing. He was the one who established a separate महिला मंडळ in Bhavsar क्षत्रिय समाज,  cidco, Nasik. He is cherished for his empathy quotient, social quotient, creativity quotient and communication skills. He is remembered for so much of literary contributions. Some well known dramas written and directed by him are 'प्रायश्चित्त', 'चार रेषांचा त्रिकोण' and 'बेकार ' , these were played in परशुराम साईखेडकर नाट्यगृह, नाशिक. His बालनाट्य,   'गोष्ट एका शेंडीची' gained popularity in several shows played in कालिदास कलामंदिर, नाशिक. 'जानता राजा ', 'बॉबी ची गोष्ट ' and 'Son of God' written and directed by him received love in Nasik and the videos even traveled across country. Several बालनाट्य  written and directed by him were 'मुले tv वर जातात ', 'मुले चोर पकडतात ', 'चामडेपती झिंदाबाद ', 'किस्सा अपहरणाचा ', 'संदेश शांतीचा ', 'जेथे जातो तेथे' and 'detective राजू '. The कथा penned by him 'वामन ओढेकर' gained praises in 'धमाका ' दिवाळी अंक and his several write ups gained popularity in साप्ताहिक 'नगारा ' दिवाळी विशेषांक. He gained popularity through his daily column write up in गावकरी in the name of 'मनस्वी'. He was the first marathi writer to reach on internet in 1997 in the internet edition of पुणे दर्शन दिवाळी अंक, through his humorous katha 'धूमधुमाल'. He was all in one, चित्रकार,  व्यंगचित्रकार, नाटककार,  कवी and साहित्यिक. He was a super active member of सार्वजनिक वाचनालय, महाराष्ट्र साहित्य पत्रिका,  वसंत व्याख्यानमाला,  व्यक्ति विकास मंच,  संवाद: एक वाङ्मयीन चळवळ,  रोटरी क्लब and नासिक कविसंमेलन संघटना. His one of the attention seeking and heart touching poem was 'लहान माझी बाहुली ' regarding gender equity those days. One of the most impact making drama he directed was 'कारगील' for which he used LCD projector those days. Those days when there was no watsapp and internet, his write ups related to 'राष्ट्रीय एकात्मता', 'सामाजिक बांधिलकी' and 'भ्रष्टाचार आजचा शिष्टाचार ' were displayed in गणपती decorations and सार्वजनिक वाचनालय premises on hoardings. They went viral with mouth publicity and gained a lot of attention. He was teacher who would make students cry when he taught us 'कलिंगड' and would make us laugh when he taught us 'व्यक्ति आणि वल्ली '. Due to his multifaceted personality he touched the lives of thousands of students and he was also awarded the prestigious 'आदर्श शिक्षक पुरस्कार' सार्वजनिक वाचनालय नासिक. His काव्यसंग्रह 'फुलोरा ' duely autographed by his mentor वि. वा. शिरवाडकर was published at the hands of मा. दादासाहेब पोतनीस and श्री किशोर पाठक in the presence of his friends, followers, writers, and relatives.

आज ही अनेकांचे प्रेरणास्थान आणि श्रद्धास्थान असलेल्या माझ्या वडीलांना व त्यांच्या स्मृतीस शब्दरुपी आदरांजली 🙏

प्रा. डॉ. स्वाती पद्माकर भावसार, सूक्ष्मजीवशास्त्रज्ञ, H.P.T. आर्ट्स अँड R.Y.K सायन्स कॉलेज,  नासिक.